So this weekend is the big Blogher Convention. I looked and I was not nominated for best blog ever, which was a disappointment. On the other hand, I was not nominated for worst blog ever. Seems Dooce and Perez Hilton have those slots sewed up pretty tight. This means this could mean many many things, but probably it means I am not doing it right.
So I go to other blogs and I read the one thing readers NEVER want to hear about is HOW you blog. Blogging about blogging sucks ass. Then all these sights that tell me to never blog about blogging proceed to tell me how they blog, or how they recommend others to blog.
NOTE: None of them were nominated for Blogher awards either.
Now I don't know if I have a style of writing other than fire up the laptop, stare a blank screen and mentally scream to myself, "Oh fuck!! What the hell am I going to do now?!!" But usually after staring for a few minutes, something clicks and I am off on a tale that unfolds for me about the same as it does for you. Very seldom to I do much tinkering, changing or consulting. I just pour out what is running through my mind at the time.
Which is probably why I was not nominated for the Blogher Convention. I don't plan, strategize or program. I had a three day post on how I did not become famous after blogging about not masturbating. But that was not planned ahead. Each post was a completely original thought process at the time of writing.
Now I will admit I tend to think during the day if something might make a good post. But generally I am way too busy looking at porn or taking a nap to give this site much thought during the day. There have been times I have even created two or three posts on a weekend with the thought of posting them when time was short in the workweek. I believe, to date, I have lost ever single one of those fuckers.
So mostly I sit at a blank screen and slowly build up a nervous energy that demands I put something on the screen. In time, this self inflicted pressure cooker ends up in the sterling prose that you see before you now. And maybe that is the secrete to a really hot successful blog. Post less, post quality over quantity and do a polish or two before posting.
Then there is my Floridian friends Adam and Britt who have started a whisper campaign to improve my readership. An improvement initiative that seems to know no bounds if I will only do one thing. GET A REAL BLOG!!!!
These guys seem to think AOL Journals is not a real platform for blogging, and to be fair, I didn't see many on the list of best at Blogher. I have tried Wordpress and frankly was not happy with the look. I like the way this site looks. It feels like me. Scattered yet thrown together in a last minute frenzy that somehow feels comfortable and inviting. Maybe I can get that at Google. I hear Gmail is really good. I also hear Time/Warner is trying to sell off AOL. Worse, the program will barely run, it won't load it's own pages or Email and they informed me they were raising their price for a service that is free everywhere else... even with them!
Which all seems to suggest that maybe sometime in the future, when there is time and I feel comfortable making the change that I might somehow, someday, consider making a real fucking blog! And I will, one day. Honest!