Friday, December 5, 2008

Living in Hell

OK OK OK maybe the title is a bit of an exaggeration but it's all Mrs. Cris's fault. Last night we bought a 42 inch Plasma screen TV. It is not for video games (which would benefit more from an LCD) but for movies and TV and when the wife and kids are away... porn! But now, 24 hours later the freakin thing still sits in it's box because Mrs. Cris has a pile of crap in the corner of our bedroom where our old 32 incher will go... complete with the old entertainment center.

You might think the prospect of watching McDreamy on a tube a full six inches larger than the old one would be enough to persuade. But trust me, there is nothing you can offer that is around six inches that will get her excited. ...well, I can't at least.

So there is sits in a box, protected by huge Styrofoam corners, which makes the TV seem like it will be even bigger! It sits there still, taunting me, mocking me, making me wish I have never heard the cursed name Lenore (Poe'd you!) And I crawl into my computer room and blog and blog while gnashing my teeth and counting down the hours to the Big 12 Championship with OU ranked #2 in the Nation and on the brink of another National Championship... or big bowl nosedive.

Yes my friends, this is hell. Hell on steriods. This is the vision of torture most foul. Sure waterboarding sucks, but not if you get some good TV tubing later. Me... I get to sit and look at a box.


Avitable said...

That is hell indeed. I had the same thing happen with my new Blu-ray player.

Cris said...

Exactly!! Why didn't she just pull out a revolver and blow my brains out as soon as I said "I do." Noooooo, she has craftily planned out decades of torture and abuse that will not attract societal reprimands... except from other guys, which doesn't seem to count in today's America.

Ohhhhhh the suffering we middle aged, middle class white men must endure.