Friday, March 27, 2009

Sick Friends

So as many of you know, our friend Adam is under the weather. Without telling too much of his business, I want to say I have been telling him for a long time that if he keeps sticking things up there, something is bound to get stuck. Anyhoo, I am not sure what all they ended up pulling out of there but I hear it was like one of those little clown cars you see at the circus.

Which leads me to the topic of tonight's discussion: No, not the black hole of Calcutta, I want to talk about health care in America. Did you know Dave2 nearly died? OK, maybe not died, but he had a lot of pain. He was flying half way across the world in some exotic land where his kidney stones flared up and he had to be taken to a hospital. Dave was treated, pain relived and taken back to the airport in time for his flight. That's health care man!

Where was this mysterious land that renders examination, testing, diagnosis and treatment... not to mention all the paperwork... and can get you back in time for a connecting flight?! A few years ago my daughter got Chicken Pox. We are first time parents. We read up on it and the family medical book said Chicken Pox could turn lethal and kill everybody in the Continental US, so out of concern for myself... and the world... We called the Dr.

The Dr said it sounded like Chicken Pox and she really needed to be examined before she died and spreads her disease and we should absolutely, most definitely NOT take her to the Dr's office but to the ER. Because she is contagious. Evidently ERs have a disease inhibitor that is not found anywhere else in the universe. SO we go to the ER where we are told we will see the doctor in the near future. In the mean time we need to find a place, away from the waiting room, to wait. They did not want to slackers in there with broken limbs and severed appendages to rick getting sick. SO we went to the next available place with seats. The empty cafeteria. Now I wonder, how long does a Chicken Pox germ live anyway?

There we waited for maybe three more house before we were paged that our table... I mean Doctor was ready to see us. The dude looked at her from across the room, glanced in her eyes and said, "Yup, that could be Chicken Pox alright! You should take her to her regular doctor." So four hours missing from our life, a sick kid and now missing $100 we experienced rural health care. Sounds like Dave2 got it better.

And Adam, Dude, once you can stop pooping in a bag and your new sphincter transplant has healed up, I am sure you too will look back in awe and admiration at the men and women who saved your life. ...even if you might never be able to look them in the eyes without total humiliation. Oh yeah, and as the stitches begin to heal, just remember what I told my little girl. DON'T SCRATCH!!

1 comment:

Avitable said...

They found Jimmy Hoffa in there, too.