Tuesday, October 7, 2008

DEBATE #2

OK I really don't freakin care anymore. Just end this torture and put us out of our misery. Sheesh!

SO I call Lil Cristina and she says she is buying snacks for the debate she will watch over at Grandma's house. HOLY CRAP!! HOW COULD I FORGET?!! (chest tubes, epidurals, more broken ribs than the doctors wanted to count, punctured lungs, seeing my Dad hurt, sleepless nights, back killing me due to improper family beds, delirium, and a property sale that nearly went south because an Abstracter forgot to include the deed that showed WE had ownership of the property they did NOT forget to bill me for, etc) So I rush to the TV and turn it on as Dad woke up from the oral narcotics.

We were all excited as we found 2 stations that were in sync and ran both hospital TVs and cranked up both hand held speakers. Tom Brokaw looked good the picture was strong and the first question was fired out and.... the tech guy came into take Dad's vitals.

"Ohhh I will be sick all night now that I have seen this!" He starts his patter as both Dad and I try to craine our necks and look around the intruder. "I tell you what my friends. If you want to know trouble, you will know it if THAT guy gets elected."

Don't say it! Don't ask which one! I screamed at myself.

"Who? You mean Obama?" asked my dad.

DOOMED! We are DOOMED to ever watch a damn debate in peace! So they hook up a new breathing treatment and run machines to check his vitals so they will be recorded by computers (why do these guys need to be certified?) and Dad's pain meds slowly kick in as pulse checker drones on and on about the economy and how he only invests in gas, guns, gold and eh... there was a fourth one but I really was trying to ignore him. Oh yeah, he had just bought a new brace of "Colts."

So Dad was warming up to him like Denny Crane in a drunken stupor warms to the NRA. A full blown redneck game was narrowly avoided by us yelling out THANK YOU several times with the hint he should leave. But then I look over at Dad and the Oxycontin and Percocet have done their damnedest as his eyes were hooded and glassy.

We hear McCain start saying how the inexperienced Obama was responsible for every malady we have faced as a nation in the past 20 years, which seemed odd that he could be inexperienced AND responsible for so much. I was even about to bring up this illuminated tidbit when Dad blew up.

"What the hell is this shit? Hell I think we're watching a Goddamn rerun! I have heard all of this before."

About this time McCain talks about Putin and Dad growls out, "Yeah he spells it KGB, I heard it all before." And Dad, the ultimate Republican turned off his speaker in disgust as I heard McCain says, "He spells it K-G-B"

Holy craps guys! I think my Dad might be psychic when on drugs!!

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