Sunday, November 16, 2008

Bastards At AOL

OK OK OK if you don't know it, AOL is trying to kill off their business. See, Steve Case started this really good idea back in the 1990s and sent out an ass load of free CDs loaded with semi virus filled software. America embraced the near idiot proof introduction to the internet and a new medium was born.

Then Steve Case took this huge freakin monster business and sold it in a package to Time-Warner, the world's largest news source. In fact, at that time, AOL was so big, the reports were that Steve Case bought out the media giants. This was overstated. Soon after the deal, the dot-com disaster hit the nation, AOL and a ton of other internet businesses lost value and Time-Warner have never been able to figure out how to handle America On-Line.

So they aren't saying it outright, but they are doing all they can to get the message across.. "GET THE FUCK OUT! We are not smart like the people at Google! We bought a cornered market and lost it due to dumbassarosis so just GET THE FUCK OUT!"

Yes boys and girls, AOL wants to close it's doors, pitch it's tent, pack it's bags and hit the road. They are cutting their losses but they don't want to see totally inept by saying "We're too fugging stupid to know how to run AOL." So instead they are slowly cutting off services. Their picture sharing software is gone, the free spyware protection is a thing of the past and worst of all (please don't get too upset here...) They closed their blogging format.

Gone forever is the blog Y2K Survivor. The orange caveman suit, the tales of Bubba the Vampire Slayer, the tons of comments of friends saying "Dude, really... get the fuck off of AOL!" ALL GONE!

I know, I know, we should hold a wake. We should celebrate the light that once shone so brightly in the void of internet porn bots and eBay retailers. But no, my heart was too broken by the loss. I keep saying I should have visited more. I should have let the sight know how much I loved it... but I had moved on to other more Opprobrious interests. So tonight, without drama or fanfare I quietly deleted Y2K Survivor from my blogroll. They say you will never forget your first love, and as most of you already suspected, my first love was a self-love. A self love that I chose to leave behind so as to embrace others. And now the proof of that self love has been wiped away. Wiped away like the tears of a mournful reader, as I am sure you must be after reading this post.

Well fear not my friend. I replaced Y2K Survivor with a bog by my very own little girl! Check her out but keep your freakin hands to yourself or I WILL use the BB gun sitting in the corner.

1 comment:

Lisa said...

you know they had the warnings up for a month before they pulled the plug? Where were you?

But, all is not lost. Check this:

You can thank me later. Dark Chocolate is always good.