Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Horrible News

I think my wife is suicidal. Sure, sure there have always been signs like how she is always napping, the way she drives, and not taking medicine regularly, but this is serious! Once I armed her with the medical findings of the amazing Dr. Oz (Oprah's Doc) she has not altered her life one iota! Not a smiggen. Not even a little bit.

And I am the loving husband who cares for her welfare, so I follow her from room to room both at home and at work literally BEGGING her to "buck up" and embrace life and LIVE! But her mood never alters, her behavior never changes and day by day I see her slipping away.

What's worse... she's taking me with her! I mean sure I could find alternate forms of health care on the internet (so I assume) but doing that (and talking about it) would be WRONG! So here I sit (with BOTH hands on the keyboard) while Mrs. Cris is in the other room slipping into her nap of depression and life get just a little bit shorter, a little more bleak and a lot more blah.

And according to Oprah's doctor all she has to do it have sex 200 times. He wasn't even specific if it had to be spread out over the year or all at once. Naturally, given my personal limitations, I would prefer it be spread out over say... a 430 day year. But damn it I am a trooper and her health means everything to me, so I am willing to sacrifice for her well being. All I ask is a bit of the same.

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