Sales Are Lower than Expected

You know we have a restaurant here in Oklahoma called Eskimo Joes. It is "Stillwater's Jumpin Lil Juke Joint." Really it is a T-shirt shop with a burger place attached. The place got real popular in the 90s when the owner had a OSU Student draw a logo. The logo was printed on T-Shirts and the rest is history. People from all over want those shirts.

So why the hell would you want a toothy grinned Eskimo T-Shirt from Oklahoma when you could have an artists rendering of what the actual missing link just MIGHT actually look like? I don't get it readers! Expand your mind! Wrap it around the idea that evolution is real! Why do you think we break new records every year at the Olympics... do you REALLY think "it's gotta be the shoes?"!!

At first I was afraid the T-shirt design was way too crude, so I improved it to as professional looking as it will get here in the Sooner State. Still no orders are pouring in. I am left to draw only one conclusion from this failed marketing endeavor. I believe, based on low sales... You people must be a bunch of closed minded, Right Wing Christian Wingnuts that refuse to believe evolution is real!

Wellll SORRRRRRY fella Bible Thumper, but some of us with a REAL education (and not a certificate from Vacation Bible School) think of evolution as a fact and not a theory and therefore we have Scientific proof of the existence of Ball Licking Man. Maybe one day, when you grow up, you too will see how silly you were. And to think, you could have had a T-Shirt.