SO I missed a night. No, I was not busy, nor out of town nor unable to reach my computer. In fact, I was here, in my little computer room doing what I do every night. The thing is, I was not in a good place to communicate last night.
Too many things happening that range from tragic to trivial. Things that there is no way to describe that can express the utter futility or frivolity of the situations and yet those situations, those things, are still happening and evolving and will run their course. Let's just say, that for last night's opportunity, it all became a bit overwhelming and it was not a good time to post.
Now the guilt sets in. Like a pounding surf that precedes a storm at sea. Wave after wave comes crashing down upon me. Always surprising and terrifying in sheer power and totality. I feel trapped, gasping for air as I am tossed about helplessly by the full tidal mind-fuck of guilt over missing a single freakin post. A task I accept not out of obligation nor profit, but for the simple satisfaction of joining in on the conversations of life. And for that I feel battered and bruised, my sleep is haunted and disturbed because I miss a voluntary action?! OH how the Mrs. wishes I reacted the same when I forget to take out the trash or leave a bit of laundry on the bathroom floor! Damn you all powerful Internet! Damn you for controlling me so beautifully in or private, nasty little S&M relationship. You bastard.
So, I'll probably make several posts over the weekend in an attempt to supplicate the Internet Gods that wreak havoc over the lives of simple unread bloggers. NOTE TO SELF: Interesting that Blogger.Com doesn't recognize the spelling of the word BLOGGERS
Like you, I sure hope it will be interesting.
3 months ago